There’s no mindset that strives to steal your joy quite like comparison does. Whether you see someone who embodies the fitness goals you wish for, or that creative over there is just expertly implementing the same business idea you had, comparison is that scheming fiend that sits on your shoulder and tells you that you’ll never measure up. It’s crushing, deflating and downright heartbreaking. Yet, we all subject ourselves to it day after day, don’t we? Through social media, through scrolling over our favorite blogs or in our local communities, we’re exposed almost daily to someone out there who is, by all standards, excelling at something we’re also striving for.
But what if I told you that you could free yourself from that poisonous mindset that seeks to rob you of your self-confidence? I know, it sounds almost too good to be true. And in the spirit of full disclosure, I have to say no matter how hard we fight it, we will at some point feel the familiar weight on our shoulder and comparison returns to whisper lies in our ear. But that doesn’t mean we can’t take huge strides to liberate ourselves from this heavy feeling. And it’s truly as simple as this, friend: lean wholeheartedly into the core of your life’s best work.
When we lean into that sweet spot where our unique abilities, talents and gifts meet the need we see in the industry, everything changes. We go from a mindset of trying to keep up with everyone else, to one where we can rest in the security that we are right where we need to be. Creating from within, bringing forth your best work that is wholehearted by nature, gives you the opportunity to nip comparison right in the bud. If you’re fully embracing your individual talents and heart, then how could anyone else ever come close? No one will be able to embrace your calling, and your passion, quite like you can. And no one will ever be able to incorporate your one-of-a-kind viewpoint, skillset and heart into what they create.
When we stop looking around at what others are doing, and we turn an introspective ear to what lies within, we’ll find that all we need to create authentic, meaning work beats inside your heart. Stop torturing yourself by spending hours scrolling through your colleague’s Instagram account, wishing you could be more like her/take photos like that/or your house could look as perfectly styled as hers does. Don’t purposefully seek out the work your competitors are creating, simply so you can measure whether yours is on par on not. You are in a class all your own, so stop trying to make yourself fit inside a box you were never made to fit!
If we’re being honest, I struggled with comparison desperately when I first started my business. There were hundreds of designers more talented than I, and even more who were better at marketing, had larger followings, or had all the rights connections. I fell into a deep despair, realizing that I could never compete with creatives at this level. And as long as I tried to emulate their design aesthetics, to market myself the way that they did, or to reach all the unrealistic standards I allowed them to unknowingly set for me, I failed. And that’s because I was so busy looking to what they were doing, that I never turned an eye within to see what my heart held in store. But when I did, when I mustered up the courage to lean full force into a way of creativity, of work, and of life that I knew only I could create, everything changed. Not only did the quality of my work improve, not only was I able to carve out a niche in the industry that brought in the right kinds of clients, but I was happier, freer and more fulfilled than ever before.
If you’re interested in delving deep into what the core of your life’s best work looks like, and how that purpose-filled approach can transform your life, I hope you’ll consider joining us at the illume retreat this April 25-28 in the rolling hills of Austin. Registration for this three-day, luxury retreat ends tonight at 11:59pm, and less than four seats remain. Flexible payment plans are available, and registration includes everything from lodging to meals to nine speaker sessions + hands-on creative breakouts, to everything in-between. Join us for this life-changing experience right here.